During the July break at ICA I have been reviewing my course notes on the modules I have finished. I already did this with the Foundation and AC100 modules, and found it very enlightening: so many things go on during a class that when reviewing and writing up the notes I take while it’s happening, I see that a great part of it just seemed to have disappeared from my mind. It’s a great way to refresh the content. At the same time, I take the opportunity to do the reflection, answer the questions, etc. I then produce a Word or similar document with all of this. Actually, just going through the learn notes again really brings up a lot of “new” information.
In line with this, I started to go over the Power Tools module, and started with the first one “Commitment vs. Trying”… Well! I have been at it for a couple of days, doing the reflection, posting the questions, etc, and still NOT DONE. There is a lot of meat in this module, I see. It is actually an unabashed exposure of the UAC concept (which by the way, keeps reminding me of the “conflicting commitments” concept of Kegan/Lahey).
Listing three projects that I had committed to and actually carried out, was quite easy. But when it came to putting down three that I had committed to but have not managed to do… now there’s a different story. Not because there aren’t any, but because it seems that it is always due to diffuse reasons, unclear motivations, not really feeling like it (the organizing of my appartment, for instance) or even, because I don’t know how to proceed (and, it seems, I am not about to get help), in the case of my issues with relationships.
So, it has been very powerful in several ways. Actually, just allowing myself to be with these questions, holding them in my mind, so to speak, seems to me to be helpful in itself. It helps to raise consciousness and awareness of how different I feel inside when I am actually working towards what I have committed to, and when I keep procrastinating, or even refusing to see it as something I can do anything about.
Let’s see if I make it to the second Power Tool!
By the way, I am still not clear either on my Coaching Model nor on my Power Tool…